Building My House

Proverbs 14:1 “The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down.”

The girls will be two in a couple of months and I am beginning to sense, in a compelling way, that our time during the day is no longer just about survival and playtime. They are not babies. They are becoming little girls. Little girls whose little minds seem to be working and churning and they are actually becoming students of sorts. I see them thinking. I see them figuring things out. They surprise me with intelligent abilities like snapping buckles together and doing puzzles correctly and “feeding” their babies like they get fed. And in these things, I am sensing the change in direction of our home life.

I have always felt that although there is certainly a good amount of advice out there that is useful and beneficial for our family, sometimes just being a good observer of my own children, coupled with being a good listener of the Holy Spirit who knows them so well, is the wisest manner to know what is going on with them and how I should care for them. In no way am I saying to not seek out counsel. Proverbs 11:14 wisely warns, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” But our most Wonderful Counselor, in fact that is one of his names, is Jesus. And he has made me fit to be Kanah and Grace’s mama specifically as my daily gift, so I know he has also enabled me for the task and speaks to me frequently about what he has for them. And I also believe, when I am willing, he turns my eyes upon them to see their needs.

I am still slowly reading Proverbs. About three verses a day. And about a week or so ago I came across this verse and couldn’t get any further because it seemed to be filled with a wealth of meaning for me and my home.

Proverbs 14:1 “The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down.”

With the sense of change already dwelling on my heart, I felt I was kind of waiting for more leading to know what to do or understand next. This verse was one of the answers. I do want to be a wise woman who builds her house and I want to avoid the follies that would cause me to tear my own house down.

One thing I noticed from this Scripture was that their is either building or tearing down. The construction of our home is in process now. It is not complete and I am just living in it. Jason and I are building the home for our family that they will live and thrive in and doing nothing towards building is a form of tearing down because it’s rotting. So I want to not be foolish to think that just going about our days purposely isn’t a form of tearing down. I want to actively build.

Because I am sinful and not perfect, when I read it my heart also acknowledged that I am not always wise. Sometimes I disobey or do my own thing and so rather than building, I am lazily tearing down. I felt compelled to write a list of ways God has enabled me to build our house thus far, first as a wife and homemaker and also as a mother. Some of these were: my own relationship throughout the day w/ the Lord, worship, asking what Jason needs me to do or what he would like, prayer walks, snuggling/kissing/touch with the girls, creativity in time/meals with the girls since it’s a weakness for them, unique time w/ girls at naptime and bedtime singing and praying, divine appointments throughout day to teach and learn, asking for God’s strength in weak moments.

I also made a list of ways I can be lazily tearing down what we have built in folly: having computer on downstairs during morning time causes great distraction and impatience w/ girls, skipping prayer, not practicing the presence of God (talking to him throughout day as I need help and feel weaknesses rise up), bad attitude during eating times, when schedules are more important than relationship, lack of visioneering and just surviving, tiredly ignoring God moments. I know that even in these times and others I may have not mentioned here, God is about restoring and redeeming. And even when I have (and will) go to these places and not embrace fully being a Woman who Builds Her House, God can still correct that in me and make my mistakes his redemptive stories in our lives.

Another thing that I found the Lord saying to me on this was that I should look to women in my life who have already begun to build their homes in wisdom. I literally made a list of those women and now am determined to go and meet with them and glean from the fields they have been cultivating. I think I want to try to do this with a number of them before the next baby comes at the end of March; otherwise it will be a while before I will have that kind of time (and brainpower) again to start my planning.

Lastly, for now, the Lord continued to work on this topic with me as I continued my Proverbs reading by giving me correlating Scripture to make that verse more full in my heart.

Proverbs 15:6 “In the house of the righteous is much treasure.”

Proverbs 24:4 “By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with precious and pleasant riches.”

The fullness of all three of these verses was reminded to me in a scribbled reference note I had written myself a couple of years ago. It took me to Colossians 2:3 (I would encourage you to read the verses before too but for now the point is about what is found in Christ) “...Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.”

I really liked the addition of these verses to my thinking about how to build my house because its focus was on, first, my own relationship with God. Because I am not righteous without Christ. And I do not have wisdom, understanding or knowledge without Christ. And according to these verses, I must have these to have a house filled with treasures. Knowing Jesus Christ is to have obtained spiritual blessings that are readily available to us – forgiveness, redemption, restoration, love, grace, mercy, kindness, goodness, joy, and on and on. Oh to have the rooms of our home filled with these treasures! What a gift it would be to my girls and to me and Jason. I look forward over the years to finding these treasures in abundance and enjoying them as a family. I don’t know how to express my gratitude with full sincerity about how I feel to be given every spiritual blessing in Christ. It is our fountain of life.